Making room

Have you ever had you train of thought completely wrecked by God? Let me share a little of what God has been showing me, and keeps reminding me of. I have been in Tennessee now for almost a week and a half, but the week before I came up here I was really battling in my mind how exactly this trip was going to happen, and what the purpose of the trip really was for. Every time I found myself starting to worry about the trip I would take time go and pray and worship God and exult who he is. It was Saturday morning as I was getting ready to go to the missions base where I started processing through my mind again the financial calculations, what all I needed to do in preparation for my trip and what my trip was going to look like. When it was like all my thoughts disappeared and the though crossed my mind, "GIVE ME ROOM." I was left completely dumb founded. Knowing that God was trying to get through to me to let go my worries and trust Him in what he's asked me to do. So I continued on my day realizing that my trip would be fine, even if I didn't understand exactly how it will work out. I went to the base where that evening I was going to be leading worship coorporately for the first time in quite a while and started to prepare music for it. I started getting so agrivated in my preparations nothing seemed to be working, the music I knew wasn't flowing together, needless to say I was having issues. It was at the moment again for was reminded of the words, "GIVE ME ROOM," so I had some songs available but truly had no idea how the evening was going to go. I continued through the bbq pretty quiet trying to listen to what the Holy Spirit would speak to me, and was praying for some scripture to come to mind that would back up these words that kept playing through my head, when I was reminded of Mary and Martha's story.

Luke 10:38-42
 Now as they were traveling along, He entered a village; and a woman named Martha welcomed Him into her home. ³⁹ She had a sister called Mary, who was seated at the Lord’s feet, listening to His word. ⁴⁰ But Martha was distracted with ^[a]all her preparations; and she came up to Him and said, “Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to do all the serving alone? Then tell her to help me.” ⁴¹ But the Lord answered and said to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered about so many things; ⁴² but only one thing is necessary, for Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her.”

I realized there is nothing wrong with prepation as long is it isn't keeping you from God's purposes. Jesus' purpose of this trip was to share His word and the most important thing was to sit at His feet and listen. Martha was missing the fellowship with Jesus. I had let my preparations move me to frustrations instead of seeking what God's heart was in the very moment. I am so glad He reminded me before I left for TN because it could have been a REALLY hard trip. Granted, I still have soo many needs for the future, my needs for the day have been fully met and even more then I could have expected. All I can do is "Give God room," there are so many unknowns, but the one thing I know is God is so worthy of all my trust and service.

Speaking of service, let me share what my next year looks like.

1 Year Time Line:
Oct 2012-Dec 2012
- Coordinate all worship gatherings on YWAM Jax Beach campus
-Mentorship
-Organize and plan short term outreach to Brazil

Jan 2013-March 2013
-Staff Discipleship Training School
-Coordinate all worship gatherings on the campus
-Plan and setup students outreach to the Mediterranean Sea area, where we will be taking the Gospel of Jesus.

April 2013-June 2013
-Lead outreach to Mediterranean Sea
-Lead short term outreach to Brazil

July 2013-Sept. 2013
-Do a School of Ministry Development

Boasting for God's faithfulness:
1. My car had been having a lot of troubles before driving up to TN, I had checked with a lot of shops and described the symptoms, none of their diagnosises sounded good or inexpensive. So after some time (and knowing I didn't have the finances) I decided to go with the option of just putting fuel injector cleaner in my tank when I filled up in hopes that it would solve the problem. Guess what? It did!! Since being in TN the car has had no issues.
2. I have a family supports me and has been such a blessing since I've been home.
3. I knew coming up here that I was leaving my car for my little sister Haylee in faith that I would be able to make it back down to Florida in some way. (I had no clue where the finances would come from), after my support dinner last night I was able to enough money to buy my ticket which I also got discounted through my grandma. (note: I am soo thankful for the people who gave in various ways) I will also have enough money for the upcoming bills and just some living expenses.

Ways you can join my support team:
1. Become a monthly supporter, to be very vulnerable I need $1100 to cover monthly expenses. I have one monthly supporter at this moment bringing my need to $1080. Please pray about whether you can support me in this way.
2. Dedicate time to praying for me in my calling of discipleship, missions, and leading others into worshiping our wonderful God, and for all who are called to partner with me.

Cliff Diving

Standing on the edge looking down at the rough rocks below knowing that it's time to jump into the waters crashing below. My heart is racing so fast and every beat feels as if my heart my just jump out of my chest. My body shakes in excitement and fear trying not to focus on all the what if's. Then I do it, I jump! As I scream out I am so free, flying through the air not looking back only looking forward to all the possibilities. Well, this is my life!

Beyond a shadow of doubt I knew "it's my turn to jump," and that's exactly what I have done. This past Friday was my last day at Sherwin Williams. I am now officially back in full-time ministry. My literal job is listen to God's voice and be obedient in every situation He lead's me in to. How exciting!!! Yet, at the same point in the back of my mind I'm like "God do I hear your voice enough? How are my bills and responsibilities going to be taken care of?" Then He reminds me by speaking again to me showing me that He truly is the Alpha and Omega. This season is "full surrender." If I'm going to allow Him to be God in my life I have to give Him everything. The easy things, and more importantly the hard things. For me I have found that in my case there are a lot more "hard" things than "easy" things. I am realizing the sacrifices that truly have to be made in order to follow God leading as a full-time missionary. I have known since high school this was a calling on my life, but I let it go thinking I'd never be a full-time missionary nor was I capable. Funny thing is now that I have lifted my hands and surrendered to that call, I am still thinking God I'm not capable of succeeding at this call. The best thing about that statement "I'm not capable" is that GOD IS MORE THAN CAPABLE, in fact He's who gave me the vision!

Why am I sharing this with you today? Well, my hope is that you can relate! I will be the first to tell you, yes I'm afraid of the unknowns, and I have absolutely no idea how or where the finances are going to come from. What I do know is, God has called me to this life, I can be all in, or not in at all. I am trusting God as my supreme everything. From the air I'm breathing to the finances in my checking account. God is worthy to be praised in every situation. I will not allow my fears to keep me from walking in the direction God is lit up for me.

Over these past few days God has amazed me in the opportunities to see Him show up. From ministering until 3am Sunday to a group of men (yes, I had others with me) who were drawn in by us having worship in the open, to a new friend seeking what it means to place their faith in Christ. So I am also very excited for the unknown! Everyday there are new unknowns presenting themselves.

As I leave Sunday to drive home to Tennessee, another huge unknown, I am trusting God to direct every step of the way. From the gas stations I stop at to the people I fellowship with once I am home. I am trusting God fully as my provider. When Jesus sent the 70 out (Luke 10) he told them to leave everything, that all their needs would be met. I fully believe the same for myself.

As I leave for this trip please pray for a few things:
1. That I am sensitive to God's voice.
2. My car.
3. Divine appointments: whether it be for me to minister to them, or vice versa and that God would direct me to those who are supposed to be apart of my missions support team.

Now my prayer for you is that you examine your life with God. Are you where you are supposed to be with Him? And have you been obedient to His leading? That you recognize His voice like in Matthew 10, and that you be willing to sacrifice your comforts to completely full-heartedly serve and worship Him. That you JUMP!