Romans 4:20-21 "No unbelief made him waver concerning the promise of God, but he grew strong in his faith as he gave glory to God, fully convinced that God was able to do what he had promised."
The above scripture is referring to Abraham, one of the "fathers of the faith." When I read this today it was as if I had to stop and re-read it over and over again.
I would say I tend to be a person very driven by facts/proof, though not as uptight as some who may be considered logical thinkers. I want to be able to understand, and have a plan out of every situation I am. I want to know how things will work out. In fact, I've found that I've become less of a dare taker in some areas of life. I find myself saying, "this might hurt too much!" or I find myself passing judgement on how I would have handled a situation and even giving advice where it's unwarranted. Honestly, who am I to think my opinion matters so much?
This past weekend I moved back in with my dad, who also has his girlfriend living with him. It was a long exhausting weekend that I am overly excited to say is finished. As I moved in though, I sensed a huge weight of how long is this going to be for? I have huge dreams and what I even feel direction from the Lord on what this year is going to consist of. Though I look at the time frames and the next few month ahead of me and wonder, "is it even possible?" I share what the plans are with people, and honestly, can't help at times but to look at the possible outcomes or what ifs? I know my dreams aren't something that I can achieve on my own. I first need God as my provider, and then his children to assist. As I've taught recently on dreams and achieving them one of the steps that are apart of seeing dreams come true, is perseverance through obstacles... well, I can boldly say I am in the meat of that step in the very moment. I look at my finances, I look at my relationships, I look at my connections and scheduling and become overwhelmed with all that is going to have to be done. How do I ask for help? What are the steps I need to take? When is the right time to pursue this said step? As you can tell I am full of many thoughts.
The thing I'm realizing is in spite of these "thoughts/questions," this is where I must hold fast to faith and God's promises! What has he promised? What has he spoken? Do I ever need to doubt? I feel at times God used the many "men/women of faith" to remind us that they too were faced with unbelief, but they held on to the word of the Lord. I want to be that woman! I want to look at every obstacle, every battle, every moment of life with unwavering faith. It's what I desire!
